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Casual Sex Lifestyle

HEALING MEN WHO STILL HAVE OR ONCE HAD A LIFESTYLE OF CASUAL SEX

Men rarely realize the long-term consequences and are more enamored with their short-term benefits. Physical release and visual stimulation takes priority and precedence over emotional repercussions and spiritual bankruptcy. Guys don’t feel the need for any kind of personal healing from hooking up a lot. Guys don’t quickly see the kind of person they are slowly but surely becoming as they actively indulge in a lifestyle of casual sex with random and numerous women. If you’re beginning to see that, stay here… Here are five tips on how you’ll need to eventually heal and emotionally transform yourself, sooner or later in life – hopefully sooner!  This might be the most valuable five minutes you’ll spend in your life that will help you be the man, husband, and father that you know you’d like to be one day in the future.  

CONTENTMENT IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN EXCITEMENT. That’s coming from a guy in the Bible who had more sexual partners than most men will ever have. He lived with 1,000 women at the same time which would have sex with him at any time – even before our social media and cell phones! If anyone originally invented the hook-up, it was King Solomon! Yet his harem didn’t bring happiness. At the end of his life, he says that the most important thing that he learned was to be content with your one wife. That excitement of being with many different women will eventually lead to emptiness and exhaustion. God puts a high price tag on being content with what or whom you’ve got. It’s a really big deal in life. Sooner or later, monogamy must replace promiscuity. Are you working towards this goal, right now?

LOVE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN LUST.  Monogamy? Are you serious? Is God truly determined to kill our earthly joy and limit our sexual freedom?  That’s what most people think but look at their lives!  These men are more sexually free yet emotionally depressed, especially when it comes to the holidays. It’s so easy to settle for second best and miss out on what really matters most. We take the easy way out and do what takes the least amount of energy or time. Lust is easy; love is hard. Believe it or not, the greatest feeling in the world is that of love and not of lust.  Naked women and great sex sure can make you think you’ve finally arrived and hit the jackpot for life. That’s what the world tells you 24/7. But this booby prize is keeping you away from the grand prize! God tells us that love, not lust, is THE greatest of all earthly gifts and sights and sounds and emotions in life. You’re going to miss out on this greatest feeling on this side – and maybe the next side - of eternity by putting the god of lust above all others.

PARTNERSHIP IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN PERFORMANCE. Sooner or later, you’ll experience the freedom of not having to always be on the prowl and always having to perform and not being a player. It is a self-absorbed life and it’s not the way you were designed to live. It’s NOT good for you to be alone. God created a helper and partner for you that will spend the rest of their life, putting up with your crazy idiosyncrasies as you put up with hers. Companionship is what we need most. Life is all about finding someone who enjoys your company and not just your body. How utterly and truly liberating it is for a guy to not always have to look great and say lies in order to get what he wants. What a treadmill it is to always feel the need to perform! He who finds a wife finds a good thing! You get to grow old with someone who will love you and stay with you, even when you can’t have that erection you live for now. Isn’t that cool?  Having someone who will always have your back is much better than someone who will give you a back rub. Are you ready? For better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do you part.

PLEASING HER BODY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN PLEASING YOURS. Sooner or later, you’ll need to adopt a major shift in your mindset about sex. Up until now, your emphasis has been only on yourself. You’re indulged in a lifestyle of getting, not giving. It was mostly all about your stimulation, your release, and your sexual satisfaction. It was about what you saw and touched and what felt good to your body. Only you know how many partners or years you’ve had in which this approach permeated your thinking. Whenever you decide to marry, that has to change. It’s time now to put her satisfaction ahead of yours and to engage in marital expression that makes her feel loved and secure, first and foremost. It’s about her orgasm too and not just your own. Your body belongs to her and is meant to bring her to climax. God wants to make you into a far better and more giving lover that is totally different than the kind of physical lover you’ve been for years. This new way of thinking sees her as the end goal, not the means to the end where it’s been all about you. In fact, God gave us an entire book in the Bible describing this…

SACRIFICIAL EXPRESSION OF LOVE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN SEXUAL EXPRESSION OF LOVE. We’ve all been brainwashed into thinking that we best express our feelings of love in physical or sexual ways. It’s not true… God tells us that greater love has no man than this: that one would lay down their life for another. Jesus didn’t come to be served but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. That’s the ultimate way to show love. It’s not taking off your clothes and jumping in bed.  That’s easy. God doesn’t talk about sex as the main way to show love; He talked about sacrifice and serving. You’re willing to die for your wife, period. You compromise, not conquer. You cherish, not charm. You communicate, not fornicate. You negotiate, not manipulate. You love, not lie. This kind of practical and non-sexual way of showing love is beyond our ability to do so. That’s why you’ll need God to help you do it the right way.

Let’s set up a time to talk on the telephone, via Skype or in person about how God can heal your hurt.

Guys don't quickly see the kind of person they're slowly becoming in a lifestyle of hooking up...

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    About us

    Most counselors, speakers or organizations happen to specialize in only one particular topic above. I happen to specialize in all types of sexual hurt, injustice, pain, trauma, memories - not just in one area. (more)

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    Healing Sexual Hurt
    Dr. Sam Serio
    31915 Rancho California Road
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    Temecula, CA 92591
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    info@healingsexualhurt.com

     

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