God is the best solution and wisest expert when it comes to helping us heal from sexual hurts or habits. Not only does He have sympathy; He has solutions. He is the least surprised when we tell Him our secrets and He is most helpful in transforming us by the renewing of our mind and memories. He’s not the last resort; He’s the first choice. Why?
Here are the top ten reasons to include God in your thinking as you try to deal with your deepest hurts, painful past, strongest temptations, or darkest secrets:
- God knows what sex can do. He invented it and knows how beautiful or horrible it can be, depending on the situation and person. That’s why God wisely put a fence around it to protect sex within marriage. When it’s unwanted, it’s unpleasant and unforgettable. Sex can be exhilarating or humiliating, delightful or disgusting. It can bond a couple together like nothing else yet it can tear you apart into little pieces. Sex is not as casual as we think; it’s quite emotional. When we’re sexually wounded, we’re spiritually weakened. We’re just wired that way. He knows how we can be deeply hurt in this powerful experience.
- God wrote a book for you. He describes real life stories about family sexual secrets, violent rape scenes, honeymoon sexual bliss, sneaky sexual assaults, disastrous adulterous affairs, tender physical fondling, seductive deadly attraction, joyful sexual relations, and devastating emotional trauma. It’s all there in the Bible - so let’s examine these stories to see the huge lessons that can be learned in daily life. He gives us enormous instructions on how to overcome trauma and have healthy relationships again.
- God knows what hurt feels like. Just like you, He was abandoned by those who promised they would never leave. He had his own Judas who secretly plotted behind him and betrayed him with a gentle kiss. Sound familiar? He was stripped naked, physically violated and sexually humiliated in front of a crowd. He was acquainted with grief and a man of sorrows. He’s been there and done that with life’s injustices, tribulations, and tragedies. He offers you a new way of handling and helping you to work through yours.
- God came to bring you life. He told us that He came to bring freedom to those held captive. That might describe how you feel now. You can’t forget and you can’t forgive. It doesn’t go away, not yet. When Jesus comes, those living in darkness will see a great light. He came to rescue us from thoughts that will destroy or deceive us. The truth will set us free and He will reveal that truth to you. We need to change our thinking about God and see that He is not a kill-joy after all; rather, He came to give us joy!
- God knows what you went through. You think He wasn’t there but He was. Nothing escapes Him. Maybe you didn’t tell anyone but maybe you told people who didn’t believe you. He believes you. You weren’t alone then and you’re not alone now. He knows all the exact details of who, what, why, where, when, and how long - more than anyone else. You can get finality and clarity as He shows you the truth. The false guilt or self-blame that has accumulated through the years can fade away. It would be wise to include Him in your healing since He is the only one who knows everything that really happened to you.
- God does what we can’t do. He offers you strength and peace that the world cannot ever give you. He is able to do abundantly above all that you could ever ask or imagine. As far as the heavens are above the earth, His ways are above our ways. No self-help book can accomplish what He can do. No one can whisper to you the truths He will whisper to you when you’re quiet in His presence. If He can cause blind people to see – paralyzed people to walk – calm a raging storm – actually walk on water – and even raise dead people back to life – is there anything God can’t do in helping you to heal today?
- One day, He’ll right all wrongs. Everything we see will be reversed and the exact opposite from now. We think that those who do wrong will continue to get away with their secrets or sins but they won’t. We think this life is all there is but it isn’t. Everything will be exposed and the truth will come out. He will wipe the tears from our eyes and make the memories go away. It will be settled and justice will prevail. But before He does that, He’ll turn this bad into good. Your misery in life will become your ministry in life. You’re going to comfort others with the same comfort you’ve been given by God. Watch and see...
- Your heart is in His hands. That’s actually great news; it’s not all up to you to have to heal yourself. He can restore and soften your heart. He can make it strong again and mold it so you can trust again and feel clean again, in spite of what has happened. God is in charge of fixing any and all kinds of broken hearts and strengthening weakened hearts. The Lord is close to the broken hearted. He binds up all our wounds. He knows how you grieve your loss and hate what has happened. He’s got very strong hands. Jesus told us that He is gentle in spirit and that we’ll find rest for our weary souls and heavy burdens.
- Forgiveness comes from God. It’s the last thing you ever want to even think about and that’s okay. Bitterness and resentment can so easily and quickly grow into something very unhealthy for you. But sooner or later, there will come a time when it’s best for you to forgive and you’ll need God’s help to do this properly - especially when no apologies will ever come from the person who has hurt you so deeply. Jesus talked a lot about forgiveness and extended it to people who abused and crucified him on a cross. He’ll show you how to forgive the person/s who changed you so that you can get on with life again...
- He’ll never let you go. People let us down. They disappoint us, deceive us and even try to destroy us. God is in a totally different category. He doesn’t lie. He doesn’t leave. He is light and does no wrong. And He doesn’t stop loving – ever. His love endures forever. That’s huge. Healing takes on a brand new dimension and speed when God is allowed to enter your life when you’re re-connected back to Him. When you’ve got shattered dreams, broken promises, family dysfunction, panic attacks, overwhelming rage, false guilt, permanent memories, childhood lost, trust gone, damaged goods, or feeling depressed – there’s absolutely nothing that can separate you from the love of God that is found in Christ Jesus...
Let’s look at specific emotions you might be feeling now as we cover a wide range of sexual events…